Ok starting this thread for the Comic Jam writers: Lexy, Nichole, and myself (possibly Quamp should he wish) to work out a script for the MP Comic Jam.
Sorry I'm slow with organizing things. Communication in this will be key. Yay group effort!

Also I'd like to keep this thread limited to the MP Comic Jam Writers, So we can keep it from getting too confusing. Suggestions can be made in the Comic Jam thread in the General Discussion forum: http://www.mangapunk.com/forum/comicking/art/mangapunk_comic_jam

I look forward to the Jam!

=====================================================
Edit: I just realized I could edit Threads I started x_x Sorry I didnt do this sooner.

For Easy reference the Script So Far:

Page 1
Scene – Nighttime. It’s about midnight in a stereotypical urban/suburban area, so there’s not much traffic about, but plenty of light from business’ signs and street lamps. Everything is basically clean but a little worn. Focus is on the fast food restaurant, “Rachel’s” (a lot like “Wendy’s” but obviously not the same thing). On the sign of “Rachel’s” there’s mention of the new Manga Meals. In the parking lot is just one stereotypical soccer mom van/SUV. Neila is the only one working at “Rachel’s” at the moment.
Panel 1
Outside view of “Rachel’s” so we can see it looks like a fast food joint and see some of the neighborhood around it. Also there should be a cat (Killijoy) wandering the parking lot.
Caption: 12:58 AM, just about closing time for this particular fast food franchise.
Panel 2
Stereotypical rich soccer mom is dragging out her two kids out of the restaurant. Her kids are 8 and 11 and are covered in some sort of sticky ice cream mixture. They are both crying and whining something fierce. The mother seem angry at Neila and not her kids. Neila is staring in muted surprise of the mess of the sticky ice cream all over the front lobby. Outside near the kids, is Zombie scrambling on the ground to get inside while the mother and kids get out.
Caption – But as one hapless employee is about to find out that her night isn’t coming to an end…
Dialogue
Mother – I can’t believe this service. I bring my kids here all the time and I’ve never had such terrible service. Believe me, young man, I’m going to write a nasty letter to your management. Disgusting, there’s even roaches about!
Kid 1 (age 11) – Whaaaaa, even my SP is all sticky. I can’t press the buttons!
Kid 2 (age 8)- Ahhh! ACK! GASP! It’s all in my hair. Get it OUT OF MY HAIR!
Panel 2b (insert or aside)
Focus on Zombie as she looks at the family like she was insulted.
Dialogue
Zombie – Actually, I’m a punctual beetle. Excuse me for being on time.
Panel 3
Focus on Neila as she stands there amidst what looks like a sticky ice cream storm. She looks dejectedly resigned to her sad fate.
Caption – …Her night is just now about to truly start. Mwahahahahaha!
Dialogue
Neila – But it wasn’t my fault, the kids…well they…*sigh*…by the way I’m a girl.
Panel 4
Neila is on her hands and knees trying to scrub the lobby clean (there’s a bucket of soapy water near the counter). The family is leaving the parking lot in such a hurry, they don’t notice the cat they’re running over. Zombie is trying to climb her way up to the counter. Nelia is unaware of Zombie (and will continue to be unaware for the time being).
SFX (van leaving) – Vvvvrrrrssscreatch
SFX (Killijoy getting ran over) – MMMREOW THUNK THUD THUD OOOOEW
Caption - Hahahahahaha
Dialogue –
Neila – Why does the always happen right before closing and I’m the only one there? Have I offended the gods of drive thru in some way?
Zombie – Oh sure, pass laws to make places wheelchair accessible, but beetle accessible? Noooope.
Panel 4b (insert/aside)
Killijoy is lying in the parking lot dragging herself (kind of like a zombie) toward the restaurant. Should be some good shadowy to make it seem creepy.
Dialogue –
Killijoy - Mmmmrrrreeow!
Panel 5
Continuation of Panel 4, but now the view is from the back area of the restaurant looking out into the lobby. We can still see Nelia scrubbing up the lobby and Zombie is on the counter looking into the back area, unaware that Nelia is behind her. We can see the phone ringing in the back.
Caption – HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *cough* ha ha *cough* *cough* ha...
SFX (Phone) – Brrrring Brrrrring
Dialogue
Zombie – Hey the crazy fleshy lady was right, the service IS terrible. I can’t even get my order taken!

Page 2
Same as Page 1
Panel 1
Focus again on Neila as she’s scrubbing away. In the background Zombie is climbing on the microphone and the phone is still ringing. Neila really doesn’t want to answer the phone. Neila continues to be unaware of Zombie.
SFX (phone) – Brrrring Brrrring
Dialogue
Neila – There is no phone, there is no phone.
Zombie – How do you turn this thing on? Hey! How do I get served around here?
Panel 2
Killijoy has managed to drag herself closer to the restaurant. Should still be dark and creepy like it’s a zombie coming up.
Panel 3
Getting up and throwing down her cleaning rag, an annoyed Neila gets up to go answer the phone. Zombie wildly thrashes about to try and get her attention, but to no avail.
SFX (phone) – Brrrring Brrrring
Dialogue
Neila – I’ll answer, but it can’t be good.
Zombie – Hey can I get some service here?
Panel 4
Close up focus on Zombie as she still trying to get Neila’s attention. She’s waving so much that she’s dangerous close to falling of the microphone.
Dialogue
Zombie – Excuse me sir! Service! Over here! Paying customer!
Panel 5
Close up focus on Zombie as she’s about to fall.
Dialogue
Zombie – Whoa! WHOA! Abort, Abort!
Panel 6
Close up focus on Zombie as she falls off the microphone and bounces off the counter.
SFX (Zombie bouncing off the counter) – thud
Dialogue
Zombie – Aaaaaaaah OW Aaaaaaaaaah
Panel 7
Close up focus on Zombie as she falls off the counter and into the bucket of soapy water.
SFX (Zombie falling into water) – SPALOOOSH!
Dialogue
Zombie – Ahhhhhhhhh GLUB!
Page 3
Same as Page 1
Panel 1
Focus on Neila as she’s talking on the phone. She looks even more annoyed now.
Dialogue
Neila – What type of goth-wannabe has a birthday party at midnight? And why did you agree to it?
Neila – No I do need the overtime, but if they’re no here in the next ten minutes I am so out of here.
Panel 2
Killijoy is now at the door of the restaurant, scratching at the glass door like it wants to be let in. It should still be shadowy and scary looking in.
SFX (scratching window) Sssscreeech Ssssscreeech
Panel 3
A large commercial van that says “Nabors’s Slaughter House and Taxidermy” is pulling into parking lot of the restaurant. There is loud singing coming out of the van. We shouldn’t be able to tell it’s the rest of the cast is in the van.
Caption – Now is the time this night turn truly dark. Mwahahaha *cough* *cough* darn it. Does anyone have a throat lozenge or maybe a piece of candy maybe?
Dialogue
(the rest of the cast singing, well besides Quamp) – Ooooo... Why'd you have to go and make things so complicated?!
Panel 4
View of the front of the van. Quamp is looking back at the rest of the cast but is should be dark and full of shadows so it’s hard to make everyone out. It should be ominous and creepy.
Dialogue
Quamp – Okay, y'all better settle down or I’m turning this meat wagon around and heading straight back to the Slaughter House. Do you got that?
The rest of the case in unison – Yes Mr. Quamp sir.
Panel 5
Quamp is getting out of the Van while everyone else stays in the van. Still dark and shadow for the scary affect.
Dialogue
Quamp – Y’all sit tight until I make sure everything is setup. We’re not going to have a repeat of the party in Lebanon. Place is still inhabitable after all these years.
Panel 6
Focus on Killijoy at the door. She quickly turns and is ready to pounce at the approaching Quamp. Should still be dark and scary-looking.
SFX (rapid movement of Killijoy) - Ssswish

Page 4
Same as Page 1
Panel 1
Quamp’s back is in the foreground and off center. In the background is Killijoy about to leap up and attack Quamp. It should still be dark and scary.
Panel 2
Side view of Killijoy doing what looks like a giant attacking leap at Quamp. Still dark and scary.
Panel 3
Killijoy has landed in Quamp’s arms and is rubbing against him purring. Quamp is annoyed to see that cat. Quamp is still in shadows, but Killijoy should be quite easy to see.
Dialogue
Quamp – Oh, it’s you Killijoy. Leave it to a cat to not know how to stay dead.
Killijoy – Purrrrrr
Panel 4
Back inside, Neila is in the foreground, just about finished with the cleaning. Zombie is in the middle ground trying to get out of the soap bucket and in the background is the ominous silhouette of Quamp standing at the door.
Dialogue
Neila – Don’t even know why I’m bothering to cleaning up, it’s just going to get messed up again in a moment.
Zombie – Help, help! Beetle overboard!
Panel 5
Quamp walks through the door and it’s quite obvious he’s a mummy. Killijoy is jumping down out of Quamp’s arms toward the bucket of water (and Zombie). Neila is frozen in surprise and fear.
Dialogue
Quamp – So is everything ready for the birthday party young lady?
Neila - ……
Quamp – Well?
Neila -You noticed I’m a girl.
Quamp – Well I know the difference between a girl and a ghoul.
Neila – What?
Zombie – Heh, nice kitty.

Page 5
Same as Page 1
Panel 1
Quamp looks around at the restaurant with a very critical eye (checking for dust with his finger). Neila stays frozen in place. Killijoy is sniffing the bucket while Zombie swims to the opposite side of Killijoy.
Dialogue
Quamp – A little too clean for my tastes, but it will do.
Neila - …
Quamp – Yes that’s what I think of this place too, but it’s not my birthday party.
Panel 2
Killijoy now has a fork and knife in her paws and a bib on as she looms over Zombie. Zombie looks a bit nervous.
Dialogue
Zombie – Hey now Killijoy, we’re at a restaurant, so why would you want to eat off the floor.
Killijoy – Meow.
Panel 3
Focus on Neila and Quamp talking. Neila is still scarred but is trying to relate to the situation.
Dialogue
Neila – Sooo…..uhm…..uhm...
Quamp – Yes? I don’t have all decade?
Neila – Where’s…the…uhm…the…where’s the birthday kid?
Quamp – Right behind you actually.
Panel 4
David appears right behind Neila and she is so surprised that her hair is standing on end and has fallen to the ground.
Dialogue
Neila – AAAACK!
Panel 5
David is helping Neila up but she’s a bit numb from shock.
Dialogue
David – Sorry about that?
Neila - ….
David – So young man, do you have appropriate refreshments for the festivities this evening?
Neila – I’m a girl.
David – Ah, girls, excellent. Hopefully you have selected a good vintage?
Neila – No I’m a girl.
David – Well pleasure to make your acquaintance Gil, my name is David.
Neila – No….I…am…a…girl.
David – Well Gil, even if we put you in a dress and a wig, it still wouldn’t be the same as drinking the blood of a young maiden.
Neila – WTF!?!
+ Note: CAPS mean's action/setting info No caps is Dialog. I hope its not too confusing, went for film/TV script type writing since I'm more used to that. More pages to come! edit: not quite film script type had to change the format a bit so it could be read easier on the forum- Neila +

Page 6
PANEL 1 INTERRIOR OF THE RESTURANT, NEILA GIVES A DEATH GLARE TO DAVID WHO IS STILL OBLIVIOUS TO THE FACT THAT NEILA IS A "YOUNG MAIDEN". QUAMP LOOKS AT BOTH DAVID AND NEILA BLANKLY AND SIGHS
PANEL 2 BG QUAMP EXITS TO GET CHILDREN. FG NEILA CONTINUES TO STARE AT DAVID
PANEL 3 QUAMP REENTERS WITH CHILDREN IN TOW
QUAMP- Now, kids, y'all are gonna misbehave tonight correct?
GOUL CHILDREN- Yes!!
QUAMP- That's good. I'm sure everything will go terribly.
PANEL 4 KILLIJOY'S PAW FALLS OFF INTO THE BUCKET (PLOP!), ZOMBIE IS SWEPT OUT OF THE BUCKET BY THE WATER SPLASHING OVER THE EDGE. (SPLOOSH!)
KILLIJOY- Ah! My Paw!
ZOMBIE- Blub!

Page 7:

PANEL 1 ALL THE CHILDREN ARE ALL AT A TABLE, NICHOLE SNIFFS AT THE TABLE, CARAMEL"BEDSHEET" PLAYS WITH HER PET BAT GLEEFULLY, JOEY ROLLS A SMALL CRYSTAL BALL AROUND, KILLIJOY IS ATTEMPTING TO TIE HER PAW BACK ON WITH HER BANDAGES, NICHOLE IS SNIFFING HER PAPER HAT SUSPICIOUSLY, ZOMBIE MARCHES ALONG THE EDGE OF THE TABLE, LEXY AND KITSUNE LOOK UNGODLY HAPPY, DAVID INSPECTS AND STRAIGHTENS HIS SILVER/PLASTIC WARE, QUAMP SITS AT AN ADJACENT TABLE/BOOTH READING THE NEWSPAPER. NEILA HAS JUST FINISHED BRINGING OUT LITTLE PARTY HATS AND SETTING THE TABLE. NEILA TRIES TO APPEAR CHEERFUL.
Dialogue:
NEILA: Ok kids! I'll be back with your Mighty Mushy Manga Meals in just a little bit!

PANEL 2 BG NEILA EXITS TOWARD KITCHEN FG THE TABLE FULL OF CHILDREN: DAVID AT THE HEAD OF TABLE WEARING A PAPER CROWN, AND RUBBING HIS PLASTIC UTENCILS CLEAN, LEXY LOOKS OVERLY HAPPY AND IS SITTING NEXT TO KITSUNE
Dialogue:
DAVID: There's a spot on it...must clean!

PANEL 3 LEXY LEANS OVER TO WHISPER IN KITSUNE'S EAR
Dialogue:
LEXY: You told them where and when to show up right?
KITSUNE: Uh huh, they should be here any minute.

PANEL 4 NICHOLE IS BORED OF SNIFFING HER HAT AND GETS INTERRUPTED WHEN CLOWNS POP IN THE DOOR
Dialogue:
NICHOLE: This place is boring! It’s not even that scary. Why does nothing smell here? I wanna go hom--
CLOWN 1: Who's ready for birthday FUN!!!!???

PANEL 5 TWO SCARY AS ALL GET OUT CLOWNS PRACTICALLY APPEAR OUT OF NO WHERE AND BEGIN SINGING, NICHOLE IS SPOOKED OUT OF HER CHAIR, HER PAPER PARTY HAT LANDS ON HER NOSE. THE ATMOSPHERE OF THE RESTAURANT SEEMS TO HAVE GOTTEN DARKER.
Dialogue:
CLOWN 1: Fun time! Fun time!
CLOWN 2: Happy Happy Fun Time!
BOTH CLOWNS: It's Time For Fun Time!

Page 8:

PANEL 1 FOUR MORE CLOWNS SEEM TO APPEAR OUT OF NOWHERE. THE CLOWNS ARE TRYING TO BE CHEERFUL, BUT ARE MORE ANNOYING AND FRIGHTENING THAN ANYTHING, CLOWN 1 TRYS MAKING A BALLOON ANIMAL FOR JOEY
Dialogue:
CLOWN 1: What sort of balloon animal would you like--a doggie? I'll make you a doggie!
JOEY: I'll turn you into a doggie if you don’t get out of my face.

PANEL 2 CLOWN 2 GIVES DAVID A NOVELTY FLOWER
Dialogue:
CLOWN 2: Since you're the birthday boy, you get this pretty flower!
DAVID: Why, thank you. By chance do you know when the ladies will be showing up?

PANEL 3 THE FLOWER DAVID WAS JUST GIVEN BLOWS UP SENDING CONFETTI ALL OVER, POOF!
Dialogue:
CLOWN 2: Oops! Flower exploded! Here, I'll get you another one!

PANEL 4 DAVID SCRAMMBLES TO CLEAN UP THE CONFETTI
Dialogue:
DAVID: Ah! What a mess! I can't have this place looking like this when the ladies arrive!

PANEL 5 LEXY AND KITSUNE PREPARE TO KIDNAP DAVID
Dialogue:
LEXY: Okay, now's our chance, when he goes under the table to get the little bits of paper, we nab him and make our escape, got it?
KITSUNE: I got it! We nab him under the table and run away while no one's looking!

Page 9:

PANEL 1 CLOWN 2 PESTERS CARAMEL "BEDSHEET" WITH A BALLOON ANIMAL, CARAMEL CRYS, HER PET BAT HIDES BEHIND HER HEAD.
Dialogue:
CLOWN 2: Look! It's a pony!
Bedsheet: WAAA!! Scary!!

PANEL 2 CARAMEL TRYS TO HIDE BEHIND QUAMP WHO IS STILL READING THE NEWSPAPER
Dialogue:
QUAMP: If you want to see something really scary kids, take a look at this list of candidates in next month's elections.

PANEL 3 JOEY HAS TURNED CLOWN 1 INTO A DOG
Dialogue:
JOEY: I said to get out of my face.
CLOWN 1: Ruff Ruff!

PANEL 4 LEXY AND KITSUNE SMILE AS THEY HOLD A BURLAP SACK OVER DAVID UNDER THE TABLE, HE IS TOO BUSY PICKING UP PIECES OF CONFETTI TO NOTICE

Page 10:

Panel One: Kitsune slings sack over her shoulder hard enough to make candy fall out. Clown grabs it as he/she runs toward the door. No one has noticed them because of the chaos the other clowns are causing; Lexy's rummaging through a handbag/trick-or-treat-bag.
Dialogue:
Kitsune: How could a kid this skinny weigh this much?!
Clown: Fun Time-
Kitsune: I swear if you eat all that candy, I'll show you why I have to work for the devil!
Lexy: Pitchfork, pens, mirror, tic-tacs, sweater,-

Panel two: Lexy off screen still listing out contents of purse, Joey lost interest in tormenting the dog clown and is trying to make a cake in her cauldron. Dog clown takes off toward door with Kitsune and Lexy.
Dialogue:
Joey: Pfft! You're no fun! Scat before I sick the werewolf on you!
Clown: *Yelps*

Panel Three: Neila is still in a very frozen state of shock over what is happening, she makes no reaction as Caramel and her bat, relieved that the balloon-bending clown is gone, start using her for ring toss, paper hat style.

Panel four: Quamp is still reading his newspaper, he starts calling out names to make sure everyone's still here but finds it difficult to tell in midst of all the hoopla; Zombie waves one little insect leg in the air to try and draw attention to herself but ends up falling in the water bucket. Kitsune and Lexy can be seen arguing on their way to the van through the big picture window behind Quamp. No one seems to hear or see them. Lexy found her car keys out of her purse and throws them at Kitsune.
Dialogue:
Quamp: Nichole, Bedsheet, Joey, Killijoy, Gender-confused waitress…eh… is that everyone?
Zombie: What about me? Don't I count?

Panel Five: Four Clowns are left inside the restaurant now that Clowns 1 and 2 have exited; Clown 3 runs around in circles, laughing and throwing clouds of confetti into the air. Clown 4’s eyes light up with glee at the sight of Nichole, attempts to tackle her and put a big bow on her head. Clown 5 jumps out at Beedsheet from the shadows and makes her drop all of her paper hats. Joey is off at a dark booth, stirring her cauldron; Clown 6 pushes Killijoy into the bucket of water.
Nichole: What do ya want?!
Clown 4: OOOoooOOh! It’s a big puppy!
Clown 5: C’mon little bed sheet! Happy Happy Fun Time!!
Bedsheet: Scary clowns!
Joey: How much sulfur do you put in a cake!
Killijoy: *Splash, followed by the sounds of a cat being drowned*
Neila: Wha-who… Huh?

Panel Six: Lexy and Kitsune are fighting. Lexy's still rummaging through her purse. Clown is loading up David in trunk; dog clown is sitting between Lexy and Kitsune giving Kitsune the puppy eyes. Kitsune gives up the argument and zaps the dog with black colored magick. Dog turns into clown.
Dialogue:
Kitsune: Why don't we just leave him like that! He's much quieter!
Lexy: I'm the villainess. WHAT I SAY GOES!
Kitsune: I could just as easily turn you into a rabbit!
Lexy: Well my boss might have a problem with his best fiend being CUTE AND FLUFFY!
Kitsune: NOT. . MY. . PROBLEM!! I'm just here till they can prove I did do 2 hundred years of community service! Then I get to go to the afterlife I deserve!
Lexy: Sugar withdrawals aren't a walk in the park. If he is still a dog when you start the van, don't expect any candy!

Page 11:

Scene: Rachel’s still has the lights on; a van is pulling out of the parking lot at full speed. It’s starting to rain.
Panel One: Kitsune is gunning it down the highway, gripping the steering wheel. Singing can be heard from the back of the van.
Panel Two: David is tied up and gagged in the back. Clowns are still singing their crazy little song. David is rocking back and forth in tears and making muffled pleas for the horror to stop.
Dialogue:
Clowns: FUN TIME, FUN TIME!
HAPPY, HAPPY FUN TIME!
IT’S TIME FOR FUN TIME!
FUN TIME, FUN TIME!
David: *muffled cries for help*

Panel Three: Kitsune is sitting in the driver’s seat grinding her teeth; Lexy is chillaxing in the passenger’s seat with coffee cup saying ‘Joey’s Java’
Dialogue:
Clowns: IT’S TIME FOR FUN TIME!
Kitsune: FOR THE LOVE OF TOAST, WILL YOU SHUTUP!!
Lexy: Don’t talk about toast that way!
Kitsune: Next time you drive! I’ll-
Lexy: A villainess never drivers herself, she must be ready at all times to punish her sidekicks for their inevitable mistakes.
Kitsune: Lady, you got some nerve.

Panel Four: Back of the van has no seats. Clowns both have sticks and are advancing on David. Their shadows have spread all over the wall. David cowers in corner as they approach.
Dialogue:
David: NO! NO, PLEASE NO MORE!
Lexy: Just make sure you don’t beat him too bad. The boss’ll beat you if there’s none of the good stuff left.
David: Make them stop!
Lexy: Little vampires need to be quiet now. Lexy has an attitude to adjust.
Kitsune: What’s that supposed to mean…?
SFX: *POP*

Panel Five: Lexy has her feet on the dash and is smirking. Kitsune is hunched up behind the steering wheel close to tears. The rain goes from a pleasant drizzle to a horrendous down pour. Thunder and lightning start up.
Dialogue:
Lexy: Villainesses must never do any of the hard, dirty work. We are just here to supervise and to tell our sidekicks they’re doing it all wrong.
Kitsune: This is for insulting toast isn’t it?
Lexy: Tire change. GO!

Page 12:
Back at the restaurant. . .
Panel One: Joey is stirring the cake. Bedsheet flies by but gets caught in the updraft created by the stick moving so fast. Bat tries to flay against it, but smacks Bedsheet in the face. The four clowns gather in the background wearing Naruto head bands and disappear in a cloud of smoke.
SFX: SPOOF!
Dialogue:
Bedsheet: Abort! Abort-*thwack*

Panel Two: The smoke clears and atmosphere brightens. Nichole, a pink bow dangling haphazardly from her hair, is laughing at Killijoy. Somehow her eye ended up in the soapy bucket of water, Zombie is using it as a raft.
Dialogue:
Zombie: HELP ME!
Killijoy: *Reow* GET IT OFF MY EYE! I still see with that you know!
Nichole: What’s the matter Kitty? Can't STAND a little fun? Can't SEE the amusement in the situation?
Zombie: I'd rather drown than have to hear another flea-bitten pun like that one.

Panel Two: Bedsheet flies into the back of Nichole's head, she falls forward and smacks into bucket, pink bow flies off. That sends the water flying all over Neila, snapping her out of her trance.
Dialogue:
Neila: . . . why is it always on my shift?
Bedsheet: HAH! She’s not dead! Pay up!

Panel Three: Zombie starts scurrying around to find David; Neila tries to help find him. They have no idea where he is.
Dialogue:
Zombie: David! Joey's almost done with the cake! Hurry up so we can eat!
Neila: Why would someone disappear during their own party *looks around, ice cream falls from ceiling onto her head* Why do I ask?

Panel Four: Bedsheet realizes that David's not here, she starts freaking out. Bedsheet tries to get Joeys attention, Joey adds something to the cake, and multicolored flames flare up. Bedsheet catches fire. Nichole is wringing her fur dry.
Dialogue:
Bedsheet: David! David! I want cake! Where are you! OMYGOSH! DAVID'S GONE! DAVID'S GONE! DAVID'S GONE! DAVID'S GONE! JOEY! DAVID'SGONE!!!
Nichole: Yeah. And where’d Kitsune and her friend go off to…
Joey: Hold on! The icing's coming! Can't eat a cake without curdled icing! *cauldron flares up* Almost done.
Bedsheet: That smells awesome! Wait a minute, DAVID'S GONE AND I’M ON FIRE! At least I don't reek of fresh eggnog this time.

Panel Five: Bedsheet flies in circles to try and get fire out, Quamp's paper lights on fire as she goes past. Quamp leaves to get a new one.
Dialogue:
Bedsheet: David's gone!
Quamp: If someone decides to hide in the bathroom, it shouldn't be broadcasted. Where's the nearest newsstand young lady?
Neila: We keep complementary newspapers for anyone brave enough to enter the bathrooms.

Page13:

PANEL 1: BEDSHEET FLYS AROUND ON FIRE
BEDSHEET: On Fire! On Fire! On Fire! On Fire!

PANEL 2: SHOT OF JOEY NEXT TO THE CAKE, CHEERFULLY ANNOUNCING THAT THE CAKE IS FINISHED, THE CAKE LOOKS SUPRISINGLY PRISTINE AND NORMAL
JOEY: Cake’s done!

PANEL 3: BEDSHEET STILL ON FIRE FLYS INTO THE CAKE SPLATTERING IT EVERYWHERE, ESPECIALLY OVER JOEY
SFX: SPLATTER! (Or some such)

PANEL 4: BEDSHEET IS NO LONGER ON FIRE, JOEY IS ANGERY, THE CAKE BITS AND ICEING LITTERALLY BURN OFF OF HER
BEDSHEET: Aahh…. Sweet relief. Now where's David? I want cake!
JOEY: Caaake...

Page 14
PANEL 1: QUAMP IS RETURNING FROM THE RESTROOM WITH A NEW NEWSPAPER, WHICH HAPPENS TO BE AN OLD NEWSPAPER FROM THE 60'S, HE WALKS INTO THE MAIN DINING AREA
QUAMP: So many current events...
PANEL 2: ZOMBIE IS STILL LOOKING FOR DAVID UNDER TABLES
ZOMBIE: David! Hello! Oli Oli Orcs and freak.
PANEL 3: JOEY IS ABOUT TO TURN BEDSHEET INTO SOMETHING SMALL AND FURRY, LIKE A DOG, BUT BEDSHEET PROTESTS
JOEY: My cake! I made that for David, and now it's ruined! I'm gonna turn you into a-
BEDSHEET: David's Gone!!!
PANEL 4: WIDE SHOT OF ENTIRE ROOM, EVERYONE STOPS WHAT THEY'RE DOING, STARING AT BEDSHEET AND JOEY, DAVID, NATURALLY IS NOWHERE TO BE SEEN, QUAMP LOOKS AT HIS NEWPAPER.
QUAMP: Would you look at that...Nixon won the election.

Page 15
PANEL 1: CLOWN 1 HOLDS AN UMBRELLA OVER LEXY KEEPING HER DRY. LEXY IS ORDERING KITSUNE ON HOW TO CHANGE THE TIRE BUT LEXY DOESNT KNOW WHAT SHE'S TALKING ABOUT, KITSUNE HAS THE SPARE TIRE OUT AND LITTLE ELSE. CLOWN 1'S MAKE UP IS RUNNING DOWN HIS FACE
LEXY: Stick that round thing there, and that other round thing over there!
KITSUNE: Why can't the clowns do this?
PANEL 2: LEXY BARKS AT KITSUNE, CLOWN 1 HAS THE VACANT LOOK MUCH LIKE THAT OF A VERY DUMB PUPPY, HIS MAKE UP CONTINUES TO RUN DOWN HIS FACE DISTORTING THE ORIGINAL DESIGN
LEXY: Does changing a tire look like a job for a clown!? No! They do menial tasks like beating people, holding umbrellas, and rasing the dead.
PANEL 3: KITSUNE, DEFEATED, GETS BACK TO WORK PUSHING THE SPARE TIRE
KITSUNE: At least I'm above a clown

Page 16
PANEL 1: INTERIOR OF RESTURANT, THE CHILDREN AND NEILA LISTEN AS QUAMP SPEAKS ON THE MISSING DAVID, LEXY, KITSUNE AND VAN
QUAMP: It would seem that David has been kidnapped...or he kidnapped Kitsune...or Lexy... Really, it doesnt matter who kidnapped whom, what matter is...
PANEL 2: QUAMP SLUMPED OVER IN DEFEAT, NEILA COMFORTS HIM BUT IS HESITANT TO PAT THE BACK OF A MUMMY
QUAMP: They took my van!
NEILA: There, uh...there big guy...
PANEL 3: BEDSHEET AND JOEY HAVE SINCE FORGOTTEN ABOUT THE CAKE
BEDSHEET: We gotta find them!
JOEY: Let's go!
KILLIJOY: Yeah! Let's get David!
PANEL 4: NICHOLE BEGINS A SPEECH, BUT IS CUT OFF BY ZOMBIE.
NICHOLE: Right! Let's do this for unbirthdays! And splattered cakes! And missing vampires and little baby duckies and-
ZOMBIE: How about we just go after them already?!
PANEL 5: QUAMP ASKS NEILA IF SHE HAS A CAR, SHE REPLYS DRYLY
QUAMP: Do you by chance have a vehicle we can borrow?
NEILA: It won't be coming back in one piece, will it?
QUAMP: By the looks of things, no, but then more pieces are better than one.
PANEL 6: NEILA SIGHS AND HANDS QUAMP HER KEYS
NEILA: Sigh, it's the old red Windstar under the street light.
QUAMP: Many thanks.

Page 17
Scene – Nighttime back out in the restaurant parking lot. The van sits where it was parked.
Panel 1
Everyone is running toward the van. Well, Quamp is taking is leisurely time in getting to the van. Everyone else is in a mad dash.
SFX – thumpthumpclatterclattershuffleshufflesoufflé
Panel 2a
As everyone is piling into old red Windstar (some people seem to momentarily forget exactly how you can into a van, like opening the door and windows aren’t meant as an entry way), Nichole has a realization about the van and the bad guys.
Dialogue –
Nichole – Hey, if this like a kidnapping, then why didn’t this van get succotashed? I’d would have if it was me. Not that it was me.
Panel 2b (should almost seem like this panel is “butting in” on the previous panel).
Back at the bad guys lair. David can be seen in the background swinging like a piñata while the clowns miss swings at him. Lexy chews out Kitsune for forgetting the detail.
Dialogue
Lexy – Why didn’t you sabotage the other van? Why did our vehicle get a flat? Heaven, we should have taken that van!
Kitsune– Why don’t they still make UnderRoos? I don’t know! I’m just the minion, yo!.
Panel 3
View from inside the van has everyone gets settled in the van. Quamp is sitting down.
Dialogue
Zombie – How are we going to find the Hot Topic reject anyways?
Joey – Yeah, what she said.
Killijoy – Naptime.
Quamp – Easy, with a new special device I just built recently. Didn’t think it would come in handy for something like this.
Panel 4
Quamp pulls out a very complex electronic looking device. There are plenty of read outs and displays. Quamp is quite proud of it. Everyone else looks at it in confused awe.
Dialogue
Quamp – It’s my Pretentious Detector! It finds and tracks the biggest source of pretentiousness in a given area.
Killijoy - ???
Joey - ???
Nichole – Uh, what does pretentious mean?
Panel 5
Quamp is slightly annoyed as he tries to explain the word by examples. Everyone one just looks on with confused looks.
Dialogue
Quamp – Come on know ghouls and girls, pretentious. Like in Bill O’Riley.
Everyone - ???
Quamp – Like in Rush Limbaugh.
Everyone - ???
Quamp – Like Hilary Clinton?
Zombie – Wasn’t she on the third season of The Amazing Race?
Panel 6
Quamp looks like he’s about to unravel. Everyone what else finally get what he’s talking about.
Dialogue
Quamp – Like Fergie?
Everyone – Ooooooohhhhhhh!

Page 18
Scene – Nighttime. Middle of a typical suburbia. Lots of two story houses with at least one SUV parked at each. There’s some sort of landscaping at each house. Plenty of lighting from the light posts (that are done up to look like old gas lamps).
Panel 1a (Insert)
Close up of Quamp looking down at his Pretentious Detector flash and indicate it found its target. The Detector shows its indented target by a headshot of the person. A previous target in the queue shows Dr. Phil.
SFX – Beeep Beeep Wooop Wooop Waaamp Waaamp
Dialogue
Quamp – Ah, ha. Works perfectly every time…
Panel 1b
The van is pulling up to one of the two story homes. The band’s original van is parked in the driveway and there’s a clown passed out in the birdbath in the front yard. Most of the group is looking out the van’s windows with a mixture of shock and surprise.
Dialogue
Quamp – …and here we are. David should be someplace inside.
Joey – Hey we’re in Suburbia. Nothing ever good happens in Suburbia!
Bedsheet – Whaaaaaahaaaaaa, I want to go home!
Zombie – Why do I feel like I’m about to step into a Raid commercial?
Panel 2
The whole gang, somewhat frightened, gather behind Quamp as they slowly go through the front door. There should be a lot of shadows on everyone and everything to give it a creepier affect.
SFX (Door) - …
Dialogue –
Nichole – Hey, the door didn’t squeak. That’s creepy.
Joey – Bedsheet, couldn’t you have just floated in and unlocked the door? You are a ghost.
Bedsheet – I can’t. This place is too…*shudder*…wholesome.
Quamp – Ssshhhh, no wonder those mortal haunted houses have all the moaning and groaning.
Panel 3a
As they all step into the the house, they find themselves in the living room. There’s a big TV and entertainment center dominating the room. There are huge speakers on either side that look like big eyes and the TV looks like a big mouth or face. It’s plenty dark to cause the entertainment center to look like a scary monster. All the group is afraid of what it could be, but Quamp is just up ahead looking into the next room. Nichole is getting close to the entertainment center, sniffing it out cautiously. Her foot is very near stepping on the remote. Everyone else is to afraid to move.
Dialogue
Bedsheet – What are you doing Nichole!?! That could be one of those self cleaning monsters.
Zombie – I think those are called ovens.
Joey – I can’t watch.
Nichole - *sniff* *sniff*
Quamp - *sigh* It’s just a ….
Panel 3b (Insert)
Close up of Nichole of stepping on the remote.
SFX - KLURKICK
Dialogue
Remote (digital readout) – Powering On.
Quamp (off panel) – ….TV.
Panel 4
Everyone freezes in panic. Bedsheet flattens her self on the wall. Joey pulls her hat over her face. Zombie and Nichole clutch each other in fear. Quamp just smack his head with his hand in exasperation. On the TV is a huge close up of Rosie O’Donell’s face (she’s on the show “The View”).
SFX (Rosie talking on the TV) - …And next on The View, Scrapbooking Expert Chris Nemec.
Dialogue-
Quamp – Well, there goes any surprise.
Bedsheet – Whaaa, I’m too old to die!
Zombie – Uhmmm Bedsheet…
Joey – I’ve never seen such a horrid…
Panel 5
Focus mainly on Nichole and Quamp as they speak. Quamp is turning off the TV with the remote, while Nichole is trying to talk to Quamp while keeping a wary eye on the TV. In the background everyone else is trying to pry Bedsheet off the wall.
SFX (Remote) – Click
Dialogue
Nichole – What in the Lunar Eclipse was that Quamp?
Joey – Who knew a ghost could be so heavy?
Bedsheet – Well, excuse me cauldron butt.
Quamp – It’s merely a source of amusement and entertainment.
Nichole – Oh, like a torture chamber?
Quamp – How aptly put. Yes, TV is very much like a torture chamber.

Page 19
Scene- Quamp has moved into the Laundry room which has those large upright washer and dryer. There should be plenty of laundry supplies about on shelves and various other boxes of stuff (in a orderly fashion). Quamp is standing near the washer. There another door that leads into the kitchen (but is currently closed.) Light filtering in from a lone window gives the washer and dryer and ominous and scary look.
Panel 1
Focus on Quamp as he hangs on the washer has if he needs it for “support” (more like mental support). Everyone else is wandering into the room, a bit more cautiously now. There’s a click noise here Quamp has accidentally pressed a button.
SFX - Click
Dialouge-
Quamp – Okay, I know these normal houses are scary, but please be aware of your surroundings.
Panel 2
The washer that Quamp is leaning on has opened and Quamp has fallen in. Bedsheet panics, and flies right at the dryer. Nichole tries to grab at Quamp’s feet as he falls into the washer. Everyone else huddles for protection.
SFX – Whhhhiirrrrllll
Dialogue –
Quamp – See what happens when you don’t vote!
Nichole – Quamp!
Bedsheet – It’s eating him with it’s eye!
Panel 3
The Washer door slams on Quamp and Bedsheet, in a blind panic, flies into the dryer which now has its door open. Nicole is reaching for Bedsheet as she has her other hand on the washer door. Killijoy (with Zombie riding) are running scared toward the door to the kitchen.
Dialogue –
Bedsheet – Oh no, not again!
Killijoy – Better part of valor!
Nichole – Growwwl!
Panel 4
The door to the kitchen is wide open and we see the whole group in it, with there mouths wide with surprise. Nichole can’t see because everyone is in front of her and she’s still somewhat staring at the washer and dryer.
Page 20
Scene - Interior of the kitchen. Very large fancy kitchen with an island area in the middle and a breakfast nook of to the side. All the villains are in the room. Two clowns are prodding David (who’s hanging from the ceiling) with electric mixers. Lexy is in the fridge and Kitsune is sitting in the breakfast nook reading the cook book “How to Serve Man”
Panel 1
None of the villains notice and of the surprised heroes except for Lexy, and she has half a cake in her mouth.
Dialogue –
Lexy – Mmmmhhhorrrph
Panel 2
Close up of Lexy swallowing the cake whole and it retains it’s shape as it goes down her throat (so it's like a cartoon).
Dialogue-
Lexy – GULP
Panel 3
Lexy now stands between her group and the heroes as they look like they are about to go at it. Lexy looks worn out and a tad frustrated.
Dialogue
Nichole – Grrrrr!
Joey – Bubble bubble, boil and toil…
Kitsune – Oh, you white hats are going down like buttered toast!
Lexy – Sigh, okay we’ll let you in for a cut of the action.
Panel 4
Close up Lexy as she fishes out a jug of chocolate milk as she continues to talk to everyone.
Dialogue
Lexy – You see David, as the type of vampire he is, is full of candy. So when our Dark Lord and Master heard about it, he wanted some because, well, he lives in Hell and it wouldn’t be Hell if you had candy. So if you want, after the Dark One gets his cut, I’ll let you have a cut of the candy.
Panel 5
Close up of David as he’s still swinging around and a clown is still poking him with a mixer. He looks very confident.
Dialogue
David – Ha, my friends would never surrender me for simple morsels of flavored sugar!
Panel 6
Focus on the heroes as they’re all drooling as they all share the same thought balloon of a pile of candy.
Panel 7
Focus back on David’s now worried face.
Dialogue
David – Zoinks!

Epilogue
Scene – The same house but now daylight. Early morning to be exact. Everything looks normal and mundane.

Panel 1
Overhead view of the house. The paperboy is throwing the paper and hitting the clown still sleeping in the birdbath.
Caption – The next morning and everything seems to have returned to normal. Well, mostly.

Panel 2
Inside the house, and in the master bath, where the mother (from the first page) is taking a bath (tastefully covered by the shower curtain). There’s a shelf of towels by the shower in hand reach.

Panel 3
The mother reaches out of the shower to grab a towel. Only her head and arm can be seen out side of the shower curtain.
Dialouge
Bedsheet – Hey, watch where you’re grabbing!

Panel 4
The woman starts screaming in horror as she can now see the “towel” she’s holding is actually Bedsheet. Bedsheet starts screaming in surprise because of the woman.
Dialouge
Mother – Ahhhhhhh!!!
Bedsheet – Ahhhhh!!

Panel 5
Quamp walks in to the bathroom, with a sandwich on a plate, oblivious to the screaming. The mother starts screaming more and clutches the shower curtain to her. Bedsheet falls to the floor.
Dialogue
Quamp – Excuse me, do you have any Grey Poupon?
Mother – Whaaaaaaa!!
Bedsheet – Ooomph!
Panel 6
Neila is in the restaurant still cleaning up the massive mess everyone made the night before, she interrupted by hearing the screaming of the Mother.
Dialouge-
Mother (off panel) – Aaaaahhhhh!
Neila – Wonder what’s that all about?

Epilogue Page 2

Panel 1
In a dark and fiery, hell-like place. There are several silly little demons in the background. Lexy, Kitsune, Joey, and Nichole are all lying around and are a bit bloated and stuffed being full of candy. Nichole is actually asleep and has a big snot bubble blowing out. There should be plenty of candy wrappers lying around as well.

Dialouge
Joey – I am sooo stuffed.
Kitsune – Yeah and you’re starting to get cauldron booty from all that sugar.
Lexy – Hey, where are my evil clown minions?

Panel 2
Joey lets out a loud burp and a clown hat comes flying out. Kitsune laughs at fate of the clowns. Lexy just shakes her head in annoyance.

Dialogue
Joey – BUUURRRRPPPP!
Kitsune – Looks like they got their just desserts. Actually they became dessert. HAAAFFF!!
Lexy - *sigh*

Panel 3
Out on a lone country road, with large farms, trees and cows, we find the Windstar going down the road. We don’t see the back of the Windstar.

Dialogue-
Zombie – Where are we?
Killijoy – Kansas I think. Or a cheese commercial.

Panel 4
Inside the van, we find Killijoy hanging on the steering wheel, driving away.

Dialogue
Killijoy – That was all disturbing even for them. At least we saved David. Hey, where is David anyways?

Panel 5
Focus down at the gas pedals we find Zombie pushing on the gas petal.

Dialogue
Zombie – I think he’s in the back getting some air.

Panel 6
Focus outside on the back of the van. David is all deflated and 2D now because he has no candy in him. Since he’s so flat, he’s been blown out the window and is barely hanging on. He’s flapping in the breeze like flag. He’s dejectedly resigned to his bad situation.

Dialogue
David – Oh woe is me.

OMAKE:

Panel one: Kitsune and Lexy are sitting on a park bench licking ice cream cones (That they beat David for, of course).

Dialogue:
Lexy : Kitsune? What did you do to get put in Hell anyway?
Kitsune: Well, there actually used to be two Hells, the second was reserved for politicians. I got fed up with all the elections, so I 'took care of them', apparently sending all the politicians in an election to Hell at once causes it to freeze over.
Lexy: I take it that didn't go over well?
Kitsune: As soon as my 2 hundred years of community service are confirmed I'm allowed up where I belong.

Panel two: Kitsune takes a lick of her ice cream, her tongue is abnormally long, Lexy is staring at the huge, jagged, dark scar running down the center of Kitsune's tongue.

Panel Three: Lexy is still staring, Kitsune is oblivious.

Dialogue:
Lexy: Uh, Kit, how'd you get a scar on your tongue?
Kistune: Serated frying pan.
Lexy: WTFrig!

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