Yeah, if you've noticed, I keep writing. I guess I'm just sick of my conventional diary for now - plus, it hurts less to do this, so...eh.

Lessee, I've got a crush on this guy from CVS, near my house. He works there; name is Matt. He's sooo cute, and before I even knew John, I liked him. But the thing about me is when I've crushed on a guy that long, I inevitably get too shy to even look him in the face. But yesterday was weird...yesterday, I had enough ice cream (free Ben and Jerry's day, yesterday) that I was in a good frame of mind. I had the spoon stuck in my mouth, which had me pretty content. And I thought, "You know what? I think I'm gonna talk to him."

So, while we were in line, I was trying to figure out if my mom and I would make it to the right line. Unfortunately, his friend Tom got us first, but the three guys (Jimmy, my friend from school, the hot guy Matt, and the laid-back one, Tom - yes, I've learned their names...They're so cool, how can I not know them? XDD) were planning dinner. And Matt was talking about how he had two thirty-two ounce Awful Awfuls in two days. And Tom was demonstrating that he can eat one of those king sized bags of M&M's. And I finally talked to him. I was like, "What, you don't get fat?"

Apparently, he plays sports, and doesn't get fat. And he is SOOO tall, and SOOO skinny. He makes me instantly jealous of his skinniness. =D But he really is cute, and next time I see him, I'm going to ask him what sports he plays. Because, honestly, I'm curious.

But Jimmy says he has a girlfriend. But then, Jimmy's been flirting with me too, sort-of. Plus, he DOES NOT like Matt (fine by me). So I don't know whether he was lying or what, but something tells me as I was hearing it, that he was lying. So, meh. If he does, I kind-of still want to be Matt's friend, because he's not only REALLY hot, he's REALLY nice. At the least, I want to be friends. Y'know?

Alright, that's all my CVS drama. Promise, I'll bring updates. Promise Promise Promise.

What makes it ironic, is that morning my friends Kassy and Sam wanted to see me flirt. They've never seen me flirt, they said, and they were curious to see how I did it. Never mind THEY'VE never flirted in front of ME, but they're insistant. And I was all, "I don't know how." Because with Toll Gate boys, I don't. They're all jocks - 'gangsta' rich boy jocks. I can handle artiste types, but any sort of jock escapes me, y'know? So they were all "MUST SEE KILLI FLIRT!!!" And then, that night, I managed to muster enough gumption to talk to Matt. Irony, ne?

Now, apparently, we're going to plan a field trip one afternoon that we know Matt's working so they can see me flirt. Maybe I should sell tickets...?

My wrist's doing fine.

My ex is still persisting in being present. I'm still ignoring him.

My butt hurts, though, because I've been sitting all day. Owowowow.

.:suzu-chan/killijoy/Joeys Cupcake:.
.:"No time for goodbyes," he said, as he faded away. "It's hard to imagine, but one day you'll end up like me." Then he said, "If you want to stay alive, hold on for your life.":.